mercredi, janvier 30, 2008


I had a potential suitor (an old fashioned word completely inappropriate in this case) write me yesterday. His message? I sounded like fun (if he only knew). But because he was so busy, would I want to have a purely physical relationship?

I wrote him back, and said that while he had the wrong woman, I knew of swinger communities in his area who might be more his cup of tea. Somehow I doubt I'll hear from him again.

Now, this isn't some young dude, driven by hormones and biological wiring to scatter his seed among the females of the tribe. That of course, raises the provocative question of whether we are mostly impelled by wiring, or become more spiritual-or whether perhaps some of us are just more spiritually and emotionally intelligent than others. Or....

I would think at age 50, you would want a little more than couplings in hotel rooms, Blackberry pinging next to the bed, suit jacket at the ready for the next meeting. But people have reasons for the decisions they make-which I find fascinating.

What he is looking for and what's in his portrait (which I read with care after his email) are so different. I suspect he'd do better on craigslist or one of the alternative lifestyle websites.

As I got ready to go to bed last night I thought about what he was missing. Why would you wall yourself off from the self-knowledge, the humor, and the unexpected blessings that real intimacy brings? What can be more "fun" than that?

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