vendredi, mai 20, 2011
The confidence of letting go
Waking up this morning, and racing to leave for a doctor's appointment about an hour away, with a sick kid at home, I found myself caught up in drama.
Again, I can't be specific about the issues, except to say that ceremonial occasions can be very difficult to navigate -- they bring out the worst and sometimes the best in everyone.
You can be fighting against the odds or hold a good hand -- it's all in your cast of characters.
I'm sure you know what I mean. The relatives who haven't talked in ten years, the ex-wife and husband who won't sit near one another at weddings, the bridesmaid who gets drunk at the reception. People can become six years old again under the strain.
I know I have been tempted.
Fear, unresolved childhood trauma, jealousy, rage -- they can keep us holding on, even when we know we ought to open our fists, and unlock the doors to our own prisons.
With regard to my own personal state of mind, I did have a bit of a breakthrough last night. I'm getting close to accepting the present reality -- and that brings with it some measure of tranquility. Acceptance, a huge part of mindfulness practice, is about deciding to live in the here and now -- not trying to twist the future to our desires.
Sometimes our desires are a little inscrutable, even to ourselves.
Liberation ain't about control -- it's about surrender.
Neither you nor I can control what occurs in the future -- but we can choose how we behave in the present moment.
As you learn to let go of grasping, paradoxically enough, you are better able to cope with what may come.
It's about staying flexible, limber, and confident -- confident in your own sense of internal balance.
Funny thing -- these are just the skills I'm working on in yoga. Or not working on -- hoping that with practice, they will be there when I need to call on them.
How about you? Ready for a little child's pose? Join me. I promise, I won't peek, evaluate or judge. Learning to bend? Well, it's a lifetime challenge.