jeudi, mai 03, 2012

What babyboomers have in common with John Edwards

It's the freaking self-indulgence that gets to me.

I rarely tune into the John Edwards trial.

Sleaze isn't my drug of choice.

With his hubris, affairs, and alleged tendency to play fast and loose with other people's cash, John Edwards seems to be a toxic dump for sleaze at the moment.

And damn it, I'm not going to let the Edward's family break my heart again.

But Edwards and his family, with all of their tragedy and ambition, are  also a cautionary tale for my generation, the baby-boomers.

Read this selection from a recent McClatchy Newspaper pool report by Anne Blythe. Then imagine yourself as Cate Edwards.

"The Edwards' eldest child, Cate Edwards, a 30-year-old lawyer who has sat stoically through her father's trial, became visibly upset during a break in Reynolds' testimony.

Her father leaned over and mentioned to her during the break when the jury was out of the room that he did not know what was coming next.
Defense attorney Abbe Lowell had just objected to what prosecutor David Harbach was asking Reynolds. Judge Catherine Eagles sent the jury out of the courtroom for a brief break.
Cate Edwards said something inaudible to her father, left the courtroom in tears as her father quietly called after her, 'Cate, Cate.' "

Your father on the stand for allegations of money-laundering. Your mother and brother dead.  Your siblings growing up without a mom and with a dad who may end up in prison.

As ghastly as it is, this is a tale that my generation must own. My generation, with its multiple divorces.

My generation, where children shuttle between parents. Or when dad or mom doesn't want to be bothered, left to raise themselves.

My generation, riddled with self-important, self-absorbed, deluded parents who move seamlessly from one romance to another, little knowing the effect on their children.

As a parent whose children are being raised in two households, I can speak with some authority on this issue.

And as a split family, we actually do a pretty decent job, sharing birthdays, ball games, school conferences and holidays. We fought like hell to keep our marriage together.

 But I have no idea what the ultimate effect will be on our children.

I do have some sense on how this instability has affected Gen Xers and the Millenials, many of whom simply don't know how to construct a relationship that will last.

There are so many Cates -- and to them, I say, I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry.

There are still role models for long-term marriages around you.

Happiness and stability is not a dream. Healing is possible.

Just don't look too close to home, my dear.

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