jeudi, janvier 07, 2010

Amateur minute

I'm getting spammed a lot on this blog -- pretty much every other comment is spam.

The latest one asked readers to click on a link to discover more about "amateur telefonsex" --

First of all, if you want phone sex, why go to another amateur if you already have one as a contact on your cell phone?

And if you want professional level phone sex, complete with all the words and gasps and faux intimacy, why call an amateur?

Most of my blog readers, though not all, are Americans.
For many, English is their native tongue.
So why would they need phone sex in a language they didn't understand?
And who knows?

Telefonsex might not be sex.

Or it could be a German riff on sex, which sparks a fantasy of huge Wagnerian sopranos chasing equally large tenors -- I don't find Vikings erotic. Do you?

Calling an amateur you don't know for sex is like asking your neighbor to, err, unclog the drain, when you've seen him hit the curb pulling into his own driveway.

He's not reliable.

Amateur phone sex -- what an insult!

Who do I call to protest?

3 commentaires:

BigLittleWolf a dit…

This is hysterical!

Clearly, Telefonsex is Russian sex. Which leads me to comment on Russian spam - which I get a great deal of - on one particular (innocuous) post from last summer.

The irony - the Russian spam (neatly filtered out and stored elsewhere) affords me some small measure of ability to practice my Russian. Though unfortunately, reading Dostoevsky in the original 30 years ago doesn't provide telefonsexy vocabulary. So I miss a great deal.

Pity.

Who do I call for that?

Oh - and I can imagine one instance in which English speakers might choose their ooo's aaaaah's and other phone-sexy satisfaction in a tongue not their own. French. Let's face it - even if you don't know what they're saying, it sounds good.

dadshouse a dit…

Call me to protest. I'll answer with a breathy, deep, sexy, manly voice... :-)

Wallacewriter a dit…

OK, but I don't have your number.

Wait! Maybe I do (have your number), Mott.