Pacifists in the "Mommy Wars"

On Wednesday commentator and inside-the-Beltway, who-gives-a-hoot-what-she-thinks Hillary Rosen dissed Ann Romney, wife of the Republican heir presumptive, Mitt Romney.

Ann Romney, says Rosen on CNN, "never worked a day in her life."

First of all, that's an unbelievably stupid thing to say.   Raising five kids, as Ann Romney (a brave women who also fights MS and has survived breast cancer) pointed out, is a job -- and can be a full-time job.

It wasn't long before the blogosphere lit up with outrage -- both Obama's public relations team and team Romney didn't stop fanning the flames.

Even though, of course, Ann Romney isn't running for anything.  Even though the Republicans had gotten enmeshed in a battle over contraceptives that alienated many women who thought it had been fought and won, oh, forty years ago.

Now we have "Rosengate."

And guess who is fomenting the outrage behind this and trying to turn it into a catfight?

Mostly men.

Mostly highly paid, Caucasian men --- political operatives and the men for whom they prostitute themselves.

(Can you tell I'm not as impressed with D.C. culture as a loyal subject ought to be?)

One of the most discouraging aspects of this whole manufactured controversy is that most of us women (at least the ones I know) could care less what Hillary Rosen has to say -- or whether Ann Romney responds.

We're past the outrage. We happen to have friends who work inside AND outside the home. We know that people do thinks for reasons that are complicated -- and often not the things that they really want to do.

We also happen to know that, as much as we'd like policies that support women and men who stay home to take care of their children (and fat chance getting those from this Republican house), men are, increasingly, in  crisis.

Look at the numbers of guys who can't find jobs -- at the way the balance tips towards women in colleges.

How about the decline of jobs and economic sectors that traditionally appealed to men?

The dilemmas we face and the choices we make aren't ripped from the latest cynical political ploybook.

How about you stop talking to yourselves, Washington denizens -- and start talking to the rest of us?

Or you can keep on ripping each other to shreds.

Just look behind you, and notice -- the rest of us stopped fighting, long ago.

We're too busy talking about what really matters.