Let's hear it for old-fashioned

I'm old fashioned
But I don't mind it
That's how I want to be
As long as you agree
To stay old fashioned with me

Kudos to the person who can tell readers who wrote this song!

Horrors in Iraq. Drought in our Southeast. Fire in the West. Hubris in Washington. A sycophantic Supreme Court.

Clergy who don't know when to shut up.

It's easy to get discouraged.

But wait, don't reach for the Xanax yet.

Stay old fashioned with me for a moment, gentle readers.

Like a lot of parents, I find that some of the best conversations with the kids happen in the car. It is a truism that kids will tell you their worries, dreams and felonies when they don't have to look you in the face. I dunno if that's true or not-my offspring don't seem to withhold at the dinner table or even in church on Sundays.

So it may have been an accident when Colin told me that he was only dating one girl now on Club Penguin-and had canceled the other ten girlfriends. I wasn't shocked by the ten girlfriends-he had told me about them previously. But who was the new girl who had stolen his affections?

Her name is Fluffy, said Colin. She said she was all alone, and no one would be her friend. So I told her I would be her friend. (Apparently dating on Club Penguin means going from house to beach, feeding Puffles and just hanging out).

So why did you decide to break up with all the other girls, I asked Colin. He's not even ten yet-what would he be like when he's fourteen?

Because, cackled his sister, she's the only one who would accept him.

Worried that Colin would be hurt, I quickly (and probably dangerously) turned back to Sian. Don't say things like that, it's mean. "But that's my job as an older sister," she said.

Brothers and sisters-some things never change.

And you know what's really outrageous? When he hears her say such things, Colin just grins. Somehow along the way, the kid bought his sister's spin-and I fear that there are times, when, amused by her audacity, I do, too.